what is real (today)

 

friendship

love

understanding

a hand to grasp in the darkness

(this is today)

*****

i have begun taking a daily ::what is real:: mirror photo.

the series started the first night that we slept for a few hours at the tree house while ellie was in the PICU. in a few minutes of quiet when i was by myself in that room, i had this urge to document the real face of this new journey. in some ways, i wanted to feel seen by someone, and it turned out that being seen by myself was like a hand i could hold over those next few days. 

i have continued to seek what is real in a moment each day. before i take the photo, i think about what is real in this moment and let my face relax to wherever that truth lies. then i snap.

i am documenting the photos over on flickr but will share them here from time to time.

in this moment {what is real}

in this moment, i am sitting inside hope, inviting my emotional self to rest, keeping my eyes open (barely), climbing a learning curve, focusing on a little bean, and remembering (trying to remember) to breathe.

*****

about five years ago, i was in manzanita oregon (a place that has a piece of my heart) at a yoga retreat. during that retreat, i wrote the following: my work is to create peace around me and to write about true things, feelings, and moments so that others will know they are not alone....this is my practice. (you can read more about this here.)

a few weeks later, i started this blog, and that phrase has been a guide as i share things in this space. and, of course, i learned that by sharing the truth, i know that i am not alone.

today is a day where i need to be reminded of this.

for the last two days, we have been with miss ellie in the pediatric ICU. her heart has been "having a time of it." she is okay, and we expect that to continue. but we are scared and trying to stay really really present as we give so much love to this little one.

so if you feel moved, could you close your eyes and breathe deeply and send a little love and a few prayers to a little room in tacoma where a little heart (and a little family) is trying to find its way.

thank you...

blessings,

liz