we all have a story...
Tonight as I watched the movie The Hours I was reminded of this idea: every monster has a story.
All the people we meet in our lives have a story. The people who love us, entertain us, hold us, these people, it can be easier to recognize that they have a story. Partly because you may know pieces of it. But then there are the people who devastate us, leave us, hurt us, and behave in ways that are unimaginable, these people all have a story too. With all the people we meet along our journey, we can never really know the full extent of their story. We never really know why people behave the way they do.
We can be quick to judge and assume, but we really never know. We fill in the blanks but we don't know the real story behind a person. The baggage people carry and pull behind them and need a cart with wheels for because it is too heavy to drag.
I balance all of this with the idea that this baggage, this reality, does not give a person permission to contribute to the not-so-good-parts of another person's story. But when we glimpse a page of their story, we are given a context. An understanding. Yet, it does not erase their chosen action. But it might...it just might...give us a little space...a tiny, little space to begin to heal.
Tonight, as I watched The Hours, I was reminded of a book called There Is a Monster at the End of This Book. And the monster? Well, its just fuzzy, blue Grover.
Every monster has a story.
liz lamoreux
Reader Comments (17)
it's why i'm a social worker...our stories are woven and interwined. we all are connected through our stories, whether we like it, or not. i think it's a very beautiful, comforting thing, though certainly painful at times.
i haven't seen the hours - perhaps i should netflix it?
Eileen Wurno story comes to mind...and I own that DVD..called "MONSTER". If you ever want to borrow that movie..it's disturbing (based on a true story), heart wrenching..it really moved me (it haunts me and my thoughts actually)..and yes every monster DOES HAVE A STORY.
So true, about the 'monsters.' Although I suppose some could argue that J. Moore's character was one of the monsters in the film, her character also reminded me that 'ordinary' people sometimes have truly extraordinary stories. I'm so drawn to that idea at this stage in my life...that everyone--no matter how pedestrian their lives might seem on the surface--has a story to tell. Maybe that's simply a realization that begins to be more deeply felt as one grows older...because I look back and cringe at the arrogance I must have had when I was younger to have sort of discounted people who didn't WOW me at first glance. Monsters move among us...and so do countless extraordinary people who cross our paths--mostly unseen--every day...
This is my favorite book of all time; I also own the movie and the soundtrack. The way the story is involved with all 3 women in a circle; the circle funnels inward to the smallest of connections, it funnels out towards the bigger picture of intertwined lives. And Laura Brown broke my heart; still does. I've added something about The Hours into this week's submission for Poetry Thursday. This book, this movie and even the soundtrack, heavily affect me, even years after reading the book and seeing it.
Email me if you'd like me to share my soundtrack ~ it's incredible.
I remember reading that book to my kids! Lots of people call their kids little monsters ... I presume it's an endearment :)
Jessie wrote about this Grover book a while back, I simply must get it with Mr. 5 at the library today. I love the way you so gently put it ... all the baggage in the world doesn't really give us a reason to treat someone else rotten. Now I know what I must write today. Thank you.
P.S.--The beginning of your book grabbed me by the heart and pulled me into the screen. I know you'll keep going, and I can't wait to see what you get!
"Everybody has a story...what's your story"-This is the what I remember from one of my favorite movies Amistad when a former American President and a lawyer asks a survivor slave from the ship Amistad...
I would see Hours soon..
Liz,
Have you read the book?? It is one of my very favorite books, so wonderfully written. If you haven't read it, you must!!!
I noticed in your comments you have let someone read some of YOUR book? Can I read it??
When are we getting together again?
Enjoy the sun today!!
XO-Leth
I used to have the Grover book!! He's my favorite Seasame Street character. And the Hours is a wonderful book as well.
This is an interesting post, something to think about for sure.
Oh, I'd forgotten about the Grover book. That was a good children's story.
I have seen the movie "The Hours" but have never read the book and now from comments I think I need to. I love stories that show the interconnectedness of life because I think there's so much truth in that.
you are so right.
and yet...
at the time,
in the moment,
right then,
it is hard to accept.
I feel like replying in the comments today :)
I didn't really see Julianne Moore's character as a monster...that was kind of my point. But Clare Danes' character made that comment about her, "so this is the monster" and I thought it was so interesting. How we never really know a person's story yet it is so easy to judge them. In this movie, mental illness is also a monster (from my perspective) and invites people to behave in monster-like ways. We can easily see Richard's story and feel for him...yet he seems to be a bit of a monster himself. And Virginia suffers from the voices of the monsters in her head every day. I was moved by this movie in many ways and will be taking the book off the shelf to actually read it this time.
Glad some of you might be moved to discover or rediscover Grover's wonderful book!
This is a really thoughtful reminder to think about those around us - especially those who might be viewed as "monsters", etc.
When I read what you write here I also think about how important it is to be careful about the language we use when speaking to/about other people...labels tossed out that aren't meant to harm or contribute to sterotypes or pain but do. It goes back to the idea that we don't always know the whole story...we get glimpses.
You might enjoy reading Woolf's diaries and letters. There are so many volumes of both.
The Bloomsbury crowd led quite interesting lives, filled with art, literature, music, bi-sexuality, suicide, and adultery!
I can't remember what was revealed in The Hours - I had read so much about Woolf and the Bloomsbury group by the time I saw the film, but you may know Woolf was also in love with Vita Sackville-West most of her adult life, despite her deep attachment to her husband, Leonard. Vita's life was captured in a book (and later a film), Portrait of a Marriage, written by one of her sons, Nigel Nicholson. Vita, happily married to a British diplomat, and later living at Sissinghurst Castle, home of the famous gardens, had 2 other significant relationships with women, Violet Trefusis who is featured prominently in the film and with whom she ran away, and Alice Keppel, the great grandmother to Camilla Parker Bowles! (Alice was lover to Charles' great, great grandfather, King Edward VII. Small world, huh?!)
I remember "There's a Monster at the End of this Book" from when I was a kid! I used to love that book.
I enjoyed "The Hours" as well, much better, in fact, than "Mrs Dalloway" itself. Hearing the stories behind people's actions is so important - to know the reasons why people did certain things. It would be very easy just to label people as "monsters' or "evil nasty meanies", but that doesn't really explain anything, I don't think.
Such a wise perspective here about the people in our lives...I immediately thought of several and wanted to know the story behind why they "behave the way they do". I know it is all about my own perceptions. The Hours? Yes...lovely--the book, even better in my opinion. The Monster at the End of this Book has been read to shreds around here--but, I think it will look different to me now. Thanks for these thoughts...
I know what you mean - it´s helped me in the past when I´ve been treated badly to remember that it´s not me causing this reaction in "monsters" it´s other circumstances beyond my control. This is one of the most difficult things to teach my kids - that when the teacher is being unfair or a fellow student is being a bully or whatever - to think "what´s his/her problem?" rather than "what have I done to bring this on".