YES to gratitude {an hour steeped in it}

This morning, the house was quiet. I found myself slipping into the overwhelm about the to-do list, about the blog post ideas I had yesterday that I forgot to write down, about so many other things. I took a deep breath and decided getting in the shower would clear my head.

But instead, the ideas and "you should do it this way" thoughts started swirling. My shoulders were hunched and I could feel my face frowning.

So I turned my face toward the water and let it fall over me. Breathing. Noticing.

And I started to just make a list of gratitude in my mind. For this warm water. For the time I have alone in this moment. For the warmth of my home. For the strength I feel in my body today. For the ways I know how to take care of myself. For the kind voice Ellie used this morning. For the sound of my mother's laughter after Ellie handed the phone back to me when they talked before school. For Millie, curled up on the floor outside the bathroom door. For the way the soap lathered in my hands and felt on my body.  

When my mind would start to wander, I would pretend I was in a meditation and greet the thought (literally saying, "hello over there. I see you. I'm coming back to gratitude.") and take a breath and begin listing again. 

As I got out of the shower, I just kept practicing. 

For this favorite sweater and shoes that help my feet not hurt while I stand in the shower. For the notes my customers have been including with their Soul Mantra orders. For the warmth of this favorite brown rice tea. For the smell of this raisin bread as it toasts. For the silliness of licking the last bit of peanut butter off the knife. For the sound of the rain on the patio roof as I walk to the studio. For this sacred place of my own. 

And I didn't want to stop. I felt lighter. I started to cross to the computer to check email, but decided I wasn't ready to come back to that abyss of "to do" and instead took out my gratitude postcards and got to writing.

Letting this lightness I was feeling transfer to notes that will be sent across the miles. To an uncle I haven't talked to in years. To a friend who was such a kind listener while I was pregnant. To a new friend who teaches me with her open-hearted ways. To the friend whose known me for more than 20 years and still sticks around. 

And I felt rebooted. At home inside. Ready to be open again, stepped in gratitude, self-kindness, and love.

Yes.

A Gratitude Prompt: Consider spending an hour or even just five minutes steeped in gratitude. Noticing the truths of this moment. Noticing what you hold in your heart. Noticing the light that comes from paying attention to what makes your life so full of beauty (even in the messy times).

*****

I'm using artist Lori Portka's A Month of Thank Yous Gratitude Kit to send these notes of gratitude out into the world this month. There are 30 different postcards in the kit, so you are actually getting 30 small prints on gorgeous, thick, easy-to-write on cardstock. 

Lori's offering my readers a 15% discount this month with the code THANKFUL (just put the code in right above your order total on the shopping cart page).

*****

This November, I'm exploring the idea of saying YES to gratitude in all its gorgeous, sometimes confusing, heart-expanding ways. And I'm inviting you to come along on the adventure here on my blog.

Throughout the month, there will be a practice in letting others know I'm grateful for them, a few stories, a collaboration or two, inspiration from others, some giveaways, a special Etsy sale for my newsletter subscribers, and a few other good things. 

You can find all the YES to Gratitude posts right here. 

YES to gratitude (learning from my fifth grade self)

My hands are freezing as I move the necklaces from the rocks to my dress form to the box that sits on the chair beside me. My fingers are stiff and my breath feels airy almost wheezy in my throat in the way that happens when you aren't wearing enough clothes and are moving very fast and fall seems ready to give in to winter. And then I collide into a memory of my fifth-grade self playing soccer. 

Running, wheezing a bit in the frigid air, trying not to be afraid of the ball. Always on defense. One of the two tallest, most "developed" girls in the class. I'm not the fast one. I'm the nice one. The one who decides team sports might not be for me when a sixth grader on the other team says, "Bitch, get out of my way." At the next pause in the game, I raise my hand to my coach and say, "I'm happy to sit out so someone else can play." And I cheer on the sidelines until my voice is hoarse.

I Open My Heart, new in the shop

I move the jewelry back and forth quickly and think about how I am literally a photographer losing the light like someone in a movie. A real photographer. A real artist. A real business owner making a living creating things and teaching about keeping your heart open to the beauty and the shit.

I focus on phrases like "live it baby girl" and "I am home" and "I open my heart," and I keep thinking about that girl raising her hand to her coach, knowing when to say, "This isn't for me." 

And gratitude arrives. For her wisdom, her ability to set boundaries, her way of recognizing that something wasn't a good fit. She might not have known this was what she was doing, but she took care of herself in this really specific way. She recognized what she was good at and what didn't feel right. And she cheered at every single game.

I'm thinking about her today as I navigate my world over here. I'm thinking about this old story that I've often turned into something funny when people ask me if I played sports in high school. I'm wondering why I feel this need to make myself so small. I'm thinking about how I could reimagine this story and listen to what it has to teach me.

And I'm thinking about how much we focus on what we can't do, what we aren't good at, what we failed at, how we feel not enough.

When really we are miraculous beings finding our way. We are amazing. We are figuring out this crazy, awesome life. And we are stumbling. And we are doing brave things. And we are creating businesses and finding new ways to live our dreams into reality and becoming ninja warriors and opening up our hearts again and again.

And this is what I know: When I look up from my corner, I see so much love. I see so many of us cheering each other on until we are hoarse.

Yes.

A gratitude prompt today: What can your younger self teach you today? What gratitude do you feel for her (or him)? Take out your journal and write down the words that come to you in this moment.

*****

This November, I'm exploring the idea of saying YES to gratitude in all its gorgeous, sometimes confusing, heart-expanding ways. And I'm inviting you to come along on the adventure here on my blog.

Throughout the month, there will be a practice in letting others know I'm grateful for them, a few stories, a collaboration or two, inspiration from others, some giveaways, a special Etsy sale for my newsletter subscribers, and a few other good things. 

You can find all the YES to Gratitude posts right here. 

YES to gratitude

I'll begin by saying how grateful I am that 2200 of you came along and said "Yes to this moment" when we went on a deep dive into being present during Yes, This* earlier this month. The experience of teaching that 10-day course was transformative for me and I want to continue sharing ideas about ways we can say YES in the midst of our beautiful, messy lives. 

This November, I'm exploring the idea of saying YES to gratitude in all its gorgeous, sometimes confusing, heart-expanding ways. And I'm inviting you to come along on the adventure right here on my blog (no need to sign up for anything). There will be a practice in letting others know I'm grateful for them, a few stories, a collaboration or two, inspiration from others, some giveaways, and a few other good things. I won't be blogging about gratitude every day in November, but it will be a theme I visit a few times a week.

Thank you for being here and sharing your stories. I look forward to continuing to say YES together.

*I've received a few emails from people asking about the next time I'll be offering Yes, This or wanting ways to dive deeper into the concepts explored in that course. I will be sharing it again in the future, but until then, consider joining me for my December Water Your Soul course where we'll be exploring ways to stay centered in the midst of the holiday season. And you might want to sign up for my (almost) weekly newsletter all about creative self-care that shares stories of my in the trenches exploration of holding beauty in one hand and the messy in the other and saying YES to all of it. 

yes, this.

I shared the above quote in today's final Yes, This practice. 

Each time I read these words, I feel less alone.

I feel closer to that YES that lives inside me.

I hope you will too.

(The last 10 days have been full of magic and joy. Thank you for coming along!)

***

To receive little reminders and love notes like this quote above in your inbox, sign up to receive my (almost) weekly newsletter here.

what do you need?

This is one of the practices I turn to again and again: Asking myself what I need and then creating enough space to listen to the answer.

Sometimes this space is a few seconds, other times a minute or two.

I don't obsess about the answer or "if it's right." I just listen and learn. So often the answer is about a basic need of rest, connection, nourishment. And using this practice has become a simple daily handhold.

Try it today.

Close your eyes.

Take a deep breath.

And ask yourself: What do you need in this moment?

And then take five more deep breaths and really listen to your answer.

(You might even want to leave your answer in the comments so that you can really claim this truth today.

*****

To receive little reminders and love notes like this one in your inbox, sign up to receive my (almost) weekly newsletter here.